Why Emotional Intelligence is important for people in Leadership Roles

Most of you might have heard or read about Emotional Intelligence (EI). This is a psychological theory developed by Peter Salovey & John Mayer. But Daniel Goleman took EI to the next level and popularized it with his 5 components theory.

The 5 Main components of Emotional Intelligence (EI) just for your understanding.

Self-Awareness - The ability to recognize and understand personal moods and emotions and drives, as well as their effect on others

Self-Regulation - The ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods, and the propensity to suspend judgment and to think before acting. Hallmarks include trustworthiness and integrity; comfort with ambiguity; and openness to change.

Internal Motivation - A propensity to pursue goals with energy and persistence. Hallmarks include a strong drive to achieve, optimism even in the face of failure, and organizational commitment.

Empathy - The ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people. A skill in treating people according to their emotional reactions. Hallmarks include expertise in building and retaining talent, cross-cultural sensitivity, and service to clients and customers.

Social skills - Proficiency in managing relationships and building networks, and an ability to find common ground and build rapport. Hallmarks of social skills include effectiveness in leading change, persuasiveness, and expertise building and leading teams.

If each individual would be aware and learn the principles of EI the world could be a better place to live in.

This is one of core requirement for people in the Leadership. To be effective leaders one must have a solid understanding of how their emotions and actions affect the people around them. The better a leader relates to and works with others, the more successful he or she will be.

Here is one such story that I want to share…

Regional Business Head (Mr.X)

A long time ago one of the reputed company had hired Mr X to manage a particular region for sales, he had another Area Manager managing a very important and high revenue generating area in terms of business. She was aggressive and known for her high delivery competency. From the time Mr X started managing the entire region he always had issues with the Area Manager for his own reasons. Later the company decided to restructure the roles and introduced more layers in its hierarchy.

So Mr X took this opportunity and hired someone he knew well and made the Area Manager report into the Newly hired Regional Manager. Though it was strange and most of them in the team felt there was no need for another Regional Manager when the Area Manager was managing things well. As months passed by Mr X and the Regional Manager started to ignore the Area Manager and kept working closely without informing or giving any instructions in terms of the company's new Goals and requirements. Even when the Area manager would ask, her questions were ignored.

She was going through a hard time at work since the New Area Manager would not involve her in any of the team meetings or communications. When the Area manager took up the issue they changed her role and moved her to a department, which does not require someone with so much experience nor was it her area of expertise. She accepted and worked on it. Just a few weeks later, she gets to know that she is pregnant.

She had a lot of complications with her pregnancy and required bed rest for a couple of weeks. When this request was made, the New Regional manager told her he will check and advise. He had to consult the Regional Business Head (Mr X), they made a mockery of the Area manager, they discussed that her requests and demands are getting excessively high, we cannot even fire her from the job right now Dam because of her pregnancy. She is projecting and showing that she is the only one who is pregnant and it is the most difficult thing on earth. We know so many Woman who are pregnant, look at the labour class women even if they are pregnant, they travel by trucks and work until their due date, why is she making a big deal about her pregnancy. Let’s not agree and push it by saying HR would let her know and let's wait. But HR might say yes to her since this is on medical grounds let us tell her after a couple of days later. That’s how they ended the conversion which was through a telephonic call using the office line.

The next day as part of the Area Sales manager routine to check the call quality, she happens to hear this conversion between the New Regional Manager and Mr X, where the discussion was about her.

She was devastated, hurt and found this act so be so insensitive and being made fun of her pregnancy and when was going through a rough time both physically and mentally. She was mentally disturbed and it just added to her pregnancy complications.

My question here is that the Regional Business head Mr X & the New Regional Manager did they behave & react right. Were they aware of what they were even saying and commenting?

There was no sense of Empathy, self-awareness, self-regulation or social skills, which the leaders should have.

Can you even imagine what that Area Manager would have gone through because of such careless and inhumanely behavior from her immediate report head and higher up who are Leading teams? She was in a state of shock anything could have happened to her and her unborn child.

Being so casual, passing remarks and spoken in the most ruthless manner, there were no signs of Humanity, compassion, consideration. This shows how unaware are they about their own EI. If they would have had any sense of Empathy they would have not uttered any of those words. Would have dealt the situation in a much better and considerate manner which could have helped and eased The Area Manager. They were anyway not doing anything out of their way. Every employee is entitled to medical emergency leave which they should have just granted without making or passing such comments. Such inappropriate behavior and mental thought does put a lot of question on the state of mind doesn’t it.

Whatever the company requirements or demands are there, no one has the right to hurt or talk so low about one's situation and hurt the person’s self-esteem. This is not acceptable and these are the few reasons why Woman in the corporate world have to battle it out among the Men. Some fight for their rights, few give up as the social norms and other things come into the picture and never raise their voice.

If the policymakers at each & every company can put their hiring process with EI and compassionate tests so most likely they will hire the right leaders. Such disgusting acts will not happen in any company. It is not always the woman who suffer even Men too have a fair share of problems to deal with because of their Managers or leaders.

This is the reason they say, “People do not leave the companies, they leave their managers”.

This is one such example of why Emotional Intelligence is a very important requirement in today's leaders. This is something that can be thought, cultivated and applied only if one really wants to be a Mindful Leader.

As a Manager be the guiding light for your team, be empathetic and socially aware of your team member’s emotions, requirements. Your support and kind words do not cost you anything but they mean the world for most of the team members.

If you see the success stories or ethics of a few top companies is because they have a clear understanding and requirements from every Manager they hire who lead the teams. It's not always about the business it's about the people too.

For me, the two greatest leaders in India are Dr A P J Kalam and Mr Ratan Tata. If we can follow their Leadership principles we can bring a lot of change within us and for people around us.

Think how you can help improve your Emotional Intelligence, if you are a leader please sit down and write about what have you done until now, have you influenced your team members in the right way or have you intimated them. How you can improve yourself and your team members as well.

Leadership to me means...

“Leadership is based on Inspiration, not Domination; on Cooperation, not intimidation.” – William Arthur Wood

“A boss has a title; A leader has the people.” – Simon Sinek

“Leadership is an action, not a position.”– Donald Mcgannon

Until my next thought.. Stay Mindful